Urusei Yatsura  Beautiful Dreamer

 Urusei Yatsura 2: Beautiful Dreamer

 Draft 1: Sue Shambaugh
 Date Unknown


 Draft 2: Jeff Okamoto
 06/17/88

 This script is a translation of a copyrighted work, and as such,
 it is subject to applicable international copyright laws.

 *****
 Reproduction of this material is permitted
 for NON-PROFIT purposes only!
 *****


 MAIN CHARACTERS

 Lum
 Ataru's uninvited wife, who came from outer space.
 All she wishes is to live happily with Ataru and the others.

 Ataru Moroboshi
 Unchanged in love: a girl-crazy young man.

 Shutaro Mendo
 The only son of the Mendo Zaibatsu.
 With Sakura, he investigates the heart of the matter.

 Sakura
 The nurse in the Tomobiki High School Health Clinic.
 She has ``spirit'' powers.
 The shrine maiden who senses the spirit behind this situation.

 Professor Onsen-mark
 He is exhausted by the noise of Ataru and the others.

 Shinobu
 The young girl aiming for Mendo's heart.

 Megane
 The leader of the Lum Bodyguards.

 Kakugari
 Member of the Lum Bodyguards.
 He looks like Onsen-mark.

 Palmer
 Member of the Lum Bodyguards.

 Chibi
 Member of the Lum Bodyguards.

 Evil Dream Demon
 Living in human dreams, the person who manipulates dreams.

 Mysterious Girl
 She appears unexpectedly in front of Ataru and the others.
 She is really...?


 LUM
 Yahoo!

 LUM
 Darling!
 Darling!

 ATARU'S SIGN
 Ice.
 Brief Credits -- By Kitty Film

 ANNOUNCEMENT
 Notification from school festival executive committee.
 Representatives from each class and circle --
 Urgent: please meet in Lab #3.

 MEGAPHONE MAN
 Show your spirit!
 Pull!
 To the limit of your strength, pull!

 ANNOUNCEMENT
 >From school festival executive committee
 to all classes and circle representatives!
 Please observe speed limits when using carts in the hallways.
 The use of bicycles, motorcycles, etc. is forbidden!

 RYU'S FATHER
 The school festival purchase department
 will open a seaside for midterms.
 Today, a big evening service!
 Scanty ramen, be off!

 STUDENT
 Can't you get out of the way, idiot!

 ANNOUNCEMENT
 >From 9 to 11 o'clock,
 the central staircase will be used exclusively for ascent.

 STUDENT 1
 Don't push!

 STUDENT 2
 What, what!?

 ANNOUNCEMENT
 To all students!
 It is forbidden to wear costumes until the opening day
 of the school festival.

 STUDENT WITH CART
 Get out of the way -- Gang way!!

 ANNOUNCEMENT
 >From the executive committee to all students!
 Female students please stay no later than 10 p.m.
 I repeat, female students... 

 PALMER
 But will any customers really come to a place like this, Megane?

 CHIBI
 Isn't Ataru's suggestion better, after all --
 a teahouse of beautiful girls?
 Lum said it was OK!

 MEGANE
 There's no reason to mock Lum like that!
 Although he gathered the start-up money,
 that's all he worried about, I think.
 Are we going to let Ataru manage, with his personal taste?!

 PALMER
 Personal taste, eh...

 MENDO
 By the way, where is that ringleader goofing off?

 PALMER
 Since Lum went looking for him a little while ago,
 he'll probably come back with her.

 RYUNOSUKE
 Hey, although I hate to, I have to run soon.
 Because I have to prepare the seaside teashop, too.

 PALMER
 It's out of the question, with us being short-handed like this.

 CHIBI
 Because it's not popular with the people in charge.

 ONSEN-MARK
 Hey!
 Are you still making trouble?!
 When in the world will you finish your shop?!

 PALMER
 Don't be silly, I'm working!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Huh...

 MEGANE
 Hey!
 There's a mountain of things to be done
 concerning tomorrow morning's opening.
 That's enough play time...

 PALMER
 Ah...

 KAKUGARI
 What's the matter with you guys...?
 Say, it's a good idea.
 With this face.
 However obsequiously you decoy the customers, such a flabby...
 Hm?
 Yah!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Decoy customers with that face, eh?
 Eh?
 Where's Moroboshi!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Bring out the person in charge!

 STUDENTS
 Ahh...

 MENDO
 Professor, will you please not make an unnecessary shock?
 Taking off its options, the empty weight of this Leopard is 40 tons.
 I'll take responsibility if the floor falls in.

 ONSEN-MARK
 What the hell!
 Hey, Mendo, I don't know if this is an exhibit or what,
 but I don't remember giving permission to bring in a tank!

 MENDO
 And I say, also, that there's nothing you can do
 about the thing I've brought in.
 Or...
 Would you prefer to confiscate it?

 MEGANE
 Yay!

 PALMER
 Confiscate it, confiscate it!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Noisy!!
 Phew...
 Really, how did you bring it...?

 ATARU
 Ha, ha, ha...
 Wow, great.

 ONSEN-MARK
 Hm!?
 This lewd manner of laughing...

 MEGANE
 Ataru!!

 PALMER
 Where...

 ATARU
 I love you, Ran!

 MENDO
 In here?!

 ATARU
 Well, Ryoko, you come here, too!
 And -- hur -- ry!

 MENDO
 Ryoko!
 Are you in there?
 Ryoko!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Hey!
 Moroboshi, what are you doing in there?!
 Come out!

 MENDO
 Moroboshi, you...!

 ATARU
 Well now, Oyuki, Kurama, Shinobu...
 I know, I know.
 So, don't run away.
 Oh, Sakura, you mustn't do that...

 RYUNOSUKE
 That's enough already, you idiot!

 STUDENTS
 Ah!

 ONSEN-MARK
 What!

 MENDO
 Wah, I'm scared of the dark, I'm claustrophobic.

 RYUNOSUKE
 Hey, let go, fool!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Wah!
 Hey, somebody, save me!

 SAKURA
 Dunce...

 ONSEN-MARK
 Oof...
 My arms are numb.
 My teeth are caving in.

 LUM
 Professor, what are you doing?

 ONSEN-MARK
 Lum, help me.

 LUM
 I'd like to, Professor, but don't you know where my Darling is?

 ONSEN-MARK
 If you mean Moroboshi, he's in here.

 ONSEN-MARK
 So, please hurry.

 LUM
 Eh?
 In here?

 LUM
 Hm?

 ONSEN-MARK
 Lum, help...

 RYUNOSUKE
 Stop -- Don't come near me!

 ATARU
 But, Ryu...

 LUM
 Darling!
 Come out before I count to three!
 One!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Please help me, hurry...

 RYUNOSUKE
 Let go!

 ATARU
 Ryu...

 MENDO
 I'm scared of the dark!

 LUM
 Two!
 Three!

 MENDO
 I'm scared.

 MEGANE
 Wah!

 LUM
 Heaven's retribution!!

 ATARU
 WAH!!

 PRINCIPAL
 Well, because the school festival's once a year,
 and because I want to respect the students' independent management,
 I, the principal, will now put in a few words.
 Being difficult...
 But, that new Ran also,
 as if to say ``The more virtuous people die,
 the more bad people there are.''
 All people go on a solitary journey --
 not turning around, not crying, they walk.
 Ah, who knows, 100 feet down in the water...
 Anyone human has pain and accidents;
 then, Momotaro grew up, crossed Manchuria, and became Genghis Khan.

 PRINCIPAL
 That great Gyoete proverb,
 meaning ``Going through hardships, one reaches great enjoyment,''
 at any rate, everyone's uninjured, or at any rate unharmed,
 this is a good horse.
 Earnestly put safety first in that place!
 Well!
 (Looks at ceiling)
 Hm, mice?

 SHINOBU
 Ah, really, if you go to the Principal,
 it's long-winded accordingly, really.
 Ah, Sakura!

 SAKURA
 What, you haven't gone home yet?
 Wasn't it decided that the female students wouldn't stay later than 10?

 SHINOBU
 Well, it was getting a trifle noisy...
 And you, Sakura?

 SAKURA
 Clapping my hands with the foolish phantoms,
 nailing their idiot feet to the floor, and cursing the rest.

 SHINOBU
 I am no use.
 Night after night, the stupid ruckus...
 To top it all off, I'll probably stay here night after night.
 What a marriageable girl I am, staying here day after day.
 Mother doing the can-can on the phone.
 Enough, already!

 LUM
 So?
 Every day, it looks like a camp. I enjoy it.

 SHINOBU
 I'm not like an alien, answer me like a mortal human!
 Generally speaking, why shouldn't I go about with him?
 Although I'm not on the committee.

 LUM
 Why?

 SHINOBU
 That's it, isn't it.
 In the end, a certain person worries about a certain other person.
 Because I feel uneasy about that certain person,
 that's why I stay behind.
 Only, that other certain person is unaware
 of a certain person's worrying.

 SHINOBU
 Do you understand what I'm saying?

 LUM
 Not entirely.

 SHINOBU
 Probably because I'm tired.
 You don't understand the fighting spirit...
 It's really trying.

 SAKURA
 Ha, ha, ha...

 SHINOBU
 Huh?

 SAKURA
 No, sorry, sorry.
 But, looking at all of you, I'm fed up.

 LUM
 Say, do you want to go look for them?

 SHINOBU
 Really, what's good...?
 That Ataru...
 Without the others, this is what I think.
 That rascal is really a man.
 For an indifferent, idle, vulgar, woman-chasing,
 fickle, egotistical man, he certainly is a virtuous person,
 but...

 LUM
 But Shutaro is not very different!

 SHINOBU
 At least he has a nice face!
 This is a big difference.

 SAKURA
 The true, modern girl...

 SHINOBU
 Well, I guess I probably am.
 But, Miss Young Lover, because he has that nice face,
 it looks like it can't be helped, doesn't it?

 SAKURA
 Mind your own business!

 LUM
 I love Darling!
 With Darling, and Mother and Father, and Ten, and Shutaro,
 and Megane and the others, I want to live happily ever after.
 That's my dream.

 SHINOBU
 What!
 In short, isn't it the same as now?!

 LUM
 Therefore I'm very lucky now -- Bleah!

 SHINOBU
 Well, if only for that reason, I won't take back what I said.

 SAKURA
 I've repeatedly taken care of the fire's settlement.
 Well, at most, it's a persistent matter.
 There's one day left.
 Because tomorrow morning is the opening day of the school festival.

 DRIVER
 Oh, sorry, sorry to keep you waiting.

 MENDO
 Good -- Go!

 ATARU
 Ow, ow, ow...
 hm...

 ATARU
 What, Mendo, still mad?

 MENDO
 It's reasonable!
 That electric attack scrambled all the tank's electronics.
 The booth is a mess.
 It's all your fault.

 ATARU
 So I made a mistake...
 You're also troublesome, aren't you.
 But it was a nice dream...
 Hee, hee, hee...

 MENDO
 Don't drag people into your stupid dreams!

 ATARU
 Sorry!

 ATARU
 But, what.
 To stop at this place, to leave school like this,
 isn't it about time to go out and get some dinner?

 MENDO
 So what?

 ATARU
 Are the city streets always this quiet?

 ATARU
 Is the newest chandon house open all night?

 MENDO
 Do *I* know?!

 ANNOUNCEMENT
 News from the executive committee.
 All classes and circle representatives,
 please meet at once in the music room.
 I repeat...

 PALMER
 Ah, but I'm tired...

 ATARU
 Another day of heavy labor, eh?

 CHIBI
 How long have we been here?

 MEGANE
 It's been so long that I've forgotten.

 LUM
 It's the final stretch.
 Everyone work hard!

 ATARU
 You're really tough, aren't you...

 ATARU
 Hey!

 MEGANE
 Not Professor Onsen-mark...?

 PALMER
 Still alive?
 He's tough, too...

 KAKUGARI
 But look at his face...

 CHIBI
 Completely worn out...

 MEGANE
 You'd be too.
 A hard schedule, a noisy uproar day after day,
 he's completely exhausted.

 CHIBI
 And he's also got that 40-ton tank creaking above the
 Principal's head...

 PALMER
 He's running on adrenaline alone.

 SAKURA
 Overwork, lack of sleep, malnutrition,
 nerves out of sorts, and a bad face!
 In short, you're completely exhausted.
 You're running on adrenaline alone.
 So, first of all, lay off work.
 After a long interval, go home and take a long nap until evening.
 When your nerves act up, or if you can't sleep...
 take this.
 A tranquilizer...

 PRINCIPAL
 Thank you, Miss Sakura.
 (To Onsen-mark...)
 Enjoy yourself, Professor.
 Only one more day.
 Tomorrow morning is the opening day of the school festival.

 PALMER
 Isn't it noon yet?

 CHIBI
 I'm so hungry.

 MEGANE
 Fool, that clock's been off for a long time.
 Didn't you notice, looking at it every day?
 Be patient until the 10 o'clock break!

 SHINOBU
 What are you talking about?
 Didn't all of you go out to eat lunch at the seaside teashop
 a little while ago?

 PALMER
 Did we...?

 MENDO
 At any rate, where's Moroboshi?
 Moroboshi?

 MEGAPHONE MAN
 Pull!
 Pull with all your might!

 ANNOUNCEMENT
 Communication from the executive committee.
 Will the student who took the electric footwarmer
 from the Principal's office, please surrender it at once.

 BLACKBOARD
 Boycott accomplished!

 SAKURA
 You just ate too much, stupid!
 This is a super-powerful laxative!
 Go and take half a tablet!
 Next!

 GLUTTON
 Tranquilizer?

 SAKURA
 What?
 That ought to be...
 tranquilizers.
 If so, then a little while ago I handed over...
 Damn!

 SAKURA
 I hope I'm in time...

 SAKURA
 It's me, Sakura!
 I don't want to come in, but I will come in.
 The fact of the matter is,
 the medicine I gave you a little while ago...?
 Aaah!

 SAKURA
 Gack...!

 TV
 Madam!
 Don't go, Naoyuki!

 SAKURA
 *Grunt!!*

 SAKURA
 Damn.
 (Runs to catch Onsen-mark)

 SAKURA
 Wah!

 SAKURA
 But, it's a strange story, isn't it...
 It looks as though you vacated the room for many days,
 and returned after a long time,
 with the mold and decay inside similar to ruins.
 Like a small Urashima Taro, isn't it.
 With Tomobiki High School as the Dragon Palace, the passage of time,
 noisily, in a dream...
 You, then, saved the tortoise?

 ONSEN-MARK
 The truth is...
 Recently, I've been mysteriously worried;
 but look, I think I ought to be.
 It's as if I've walked in the streets sometime,
 and have seen some spectacle, and now, I walk there sometime,
 and I fancy that it repeats itself just as it was...

 SAKURA
 That's called deja vu...
 When they are tired, people's brains produce false personal experiences.

 ONSEN-MARK
 I thought so, too.
 And I am tired...
 But I am obsessed by strange thoughts like that...
 When I looked at that room today...

 SAKURA
 What's the story?

 ONSEN-MARK
 The Principal said that a little while ago:
 ``Today is the last day''
 And ``Tomorrow is the opening day of the school festival''...
 He used those same words, before...

 SAKURA
 You're tired.
 And because you're tired, a wish like that creates a false memory.
 It's natural, because you bear with those evil kids, day after day.
 Well, that too ends with today.
 Tomorrow morning is the school festival!

 ONSEN-MARK
 I thought so at first when I noticed it,
 but I myself am not clear.
 Both yesterday's affairs and what happened the days before that...
 No, I forget myself, and what happened a few hours ago...
 When, where, with whom, what did I do?
 On the whole, how many days have I stayed at the school?
 Three days?
 Four?

 SAKURA
 Well, it's because they were being noisy.

 ONSEN-MARK
 What I end up forgetting -- Is it from before?

 SAKURA
 What in the world are you thinking?
 Try to say it clearly!

 ONSEN-MARK
 To the bitter end, I'll set up this hypothesis --
 Of course, if it is a wild fancy produced by my weak mind,
 nothing can be better than that.
 I am thinking like this...
 Both yesterday and the day before yesterday --
 No, since before then --
 we have been repeating, with the same noise, the same day:
 the day before the school festival... And now, today, too...

 SAKURA
 That's crazy!
 You're tired.
 Being tired, your senses are just addled.
 With one more day of rest today, it will be tomorrow morning...

 ONSEN-MARK
 When tomorrow morning comes, how will it be?
 Do you mean that when tomorrow morning comes,
 it will really be different from today?
 I don't remember yesterday being different from today...

 SAKURA
 Suppose, for a moment, that it is as you say.
 Then why aren't the neighbors making a fuss?
 The parents are quiet,
 considering that the students haven't returned
 from school for that long, I'm afraid.

 ONSEN-MARK
 But what if it's not just Tomobiki High School
 that's repeating the same day?
 What if the whole town of Tomobiki --
 no, the whole world --
 is repeating the same day?

 SAKURA
 To doubt the world, too -- Cut it out!
 What you say, it's being perfectly eccentric.
 It's a wild fancy.
 That is your fantasy!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Miss Sakura...
 Since a little while ago, I have been desperately trying to remember,
 but somehow I can't remember.
 What day or month is today?
 Can you tell me?
 With nothing but the clothes on my back since yesterday,
 if I wear this kind of thing, it might be winter.
 But this sweat is summer sweat, isn't it.

 ONSEN-MARK
 Or else, what is this cheerful nature, do you suppose...?
 Moreover, since a little while ago, I can hear this...
 But this, too, is an auditory hallucination, probably...?

 ONSEN-MARK
 Urashima Taro spent days in a dream at the Dragon Palace;
 then when he tried to return to his dear old home,
 many hundreds of years had passed there.
 But if Taro were not the only one who helped a tortoise,
 if it had been all of the villagers...
 If all of the villagers had gone to the Dragon Palace,
 what do you suppose would have happened?
 Miss Sakura, you are a psychic.
 If this disaster had happened to somebody, somewhere in this city,
 you probably noticed first of all.
 However, if the accident happened to the whole city,
 to the whole world, including you, Sakura.

 SAKURA
 Won't you stop, already?!
 It's just your fantasy.
 It's no more than a conjecture.
 Where's your proof!?

 ONSEN-MARK
 If we forget talking like this, tomorrow morning...

 SAKURA
 Cut it out!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Wah!
 Somebody, help me!

 ONSEN-MARK
 Explain!
 What's going on!
 Noisy.
 I told you to go home, so go home.
 I don't want to see anybody spending the night here!

 ATARU
 You're undermining the school festival's big theme --
 ``independent management by students!''

 MEGANE
 Hey, Onsen-mark, we're getting ready.
 If dawn breaks, we'll present our case to the executive committee.
 Because of you pursuing your responsibility.

 PALMER
 To go home with it in this kind of shape...?
 Going home to wait, you!

 MENDO
 Lum, Shinobu, in my car...?

 LUM
 I'll go home alone with Darling.
 See you later.
 Bye-bye!

 ATARU
 Lum, hey...

 BODYGUARDS
 Bye-bye!

 MEGANE
 Because they were together in a place like this,
 it's an excess of feeling.

 ONSEN-MARK
 The other students have all gone home.
 Except for Oyako Fujinami in the purchases department,
 we're the only two.

 SAKURA
 Yes...
 I'm going to look for my Uncle.
 Don't make such a disagreeable face.
 A priest like him will be useful at a time like this.

 ONSEN-MARK
 Sakura...
 The truth is, I have a bad premonition...
 Be careful.

 SAKURA
 You too. I'll call you later.

 VOICE
 Lower Tomobiki...
 Lower Tomobiki...

 PALMER
 I'm beat, I'm beat.
 It's been a long time since I've ridden on an electric train.

 MEGANE
 Well, the world situation...

 PALMER
 What, what!
 ``Howling wild animal villain Jet Shin
 declares angry revenge on Antonio Inokin.''

 MENDO
 For a long time, Shinobu, I had forgotten this tranquillity...
 What in the world is it!
 Oh!

 SHINOBU
 But there certainly should have been a bridge here...

 MENDO
 It's because of the dark streets, we probably took a wrong turn.
 (To driver)
 Turn around!

 SAKURA
 Uncle, it's me, Sakura!
 Uncle!

 SAKURA
 That fallen priest...
 Just like him to forget himself and go out at a time like this...
 Hm?

 MEGANE
 Oh...

 PALMER
 This is pretty curvaceous...
 Heh, heh, heh...

 MEGANE
 Really!
 What a driver!
 HM?

 PALMER
 A circular route...?

 MENDO
 What in the world's going on?
 This is the fifth time, already.

 SHINOBU
 Tonight is exceedingly strange, isn't it...

 MENDO
 Left!

 MENDO
 This is just becoming so complicated,
 a gyromap would come in handy...

 SHINOBU
 Ah, a left turn here, I'm sure...

 MENDO
 It's a cul-de-sac.
 Go back!

 MENDO
 It's OK, because I'll see you home properly.
 Ha, ha, ha...
 It's a maze, I'm afraid...

 SAKURA
 Driver, although I must have told you to hurry,
 don't you understand yet?

 DRIVER
 Yes, yes.

 SAKURA
 It must be 2 minutes, 3 minutes at most,
 from the main street to Tomobiki High School by car --
 isn't it taking an awfully long time?

 DRIVER
 Lady, everybody says the same thing.
 Time lengthens when you ride in a taxi, doesn't it...

 DRIVER
 Lady, do you know the story about riding
 to the Dragon Palace on a turtle's back?

 SAKURA
 Now I'm appreciating how he felt.

 DRIVER
 What if not only Taro rode on the turtle's back,
 but all the villagers did?
 If all of them went to the Dragon Palace,
 and if they eventually returned to the village,
 and yet hundreds of years had passed,
 that fact becomes a problem, you see.
 Not one of the villagers would notice...

 SAKURA
 What story are you telling me!

 DRIVER
 To think of the boundary between time and space,
 it becomes a puzzling matter, don't you think?
 Too much for one thing, not enough for the other, it is said.
 If you think about it, at any rate,
 time is a product of human consciousness.
 What meanings do clocks and calendars have
 for even one person in the world!
 Why should time flow in a well-behaved manner from the beginning,
 from bygone days to the future, eh, Lady?

 SAKURA
 Interesting.
 Maybe this really was riding on the tortoise's back.

 DRIVER
 As it stands, will you go to the Dragon Palace?
 You can go cheaply.

 SAKURA
 I'm afraid you're not just a tortoise...
 Show your true form!

 DRIVER
 Idiot!!
 (To Sakura)
 Lady, are you OK?

 SAKURA
 He got away...?

 PALMER
 What is it?
 We're doubling back to the school after all?
 Can't we go somewhere else?

 MEGANE
 It can't be helped.

 CHIBI
 Heh, heh, heh -
 We've returned to where we started, in front of the front gate.

 KAKUGARI
 Um, if you also...
 that...

 PALMER
 Going through the dark,
 the place where we got off the electric train
 was the starting station...
 somehow.

 BODYGUARDS
 Ha, ha, ha, ha...

 MEGANE
 Shut up!
 This isn't a laughing matter!

 SAKURA
 Who is it, over there!

 MENDO
 What's this?
 We've returned to where we started?

 SHINOBU
 Hey, what are all of you doing?

 MEGANE
 We can't get out of the city,
 and we're not supposed to return to the school...
 I'm afraid there's only one place to go.
 (At Ataru's house)
 And so for that reason, good evening!

 ATARU
 All of you...!!

 SAKURA
 It's no use...

 SAKURA
 My house doesn't answer, either.

 SHINOBU
 What do you suppose is the matter?
 There are 200 routes at any rate to your house and mine.
 Mendo's house, too...
 At any rate, it looks like we're the only ones in the world...

 SAKURA
 It's me, I'm coming in!
 It looks as if we can't talk directly.
 As if it's only you.
 The truth is...

 MENDO
 Onsen-mark?

 SHINOBU
 Wow, it's cute!
 Where'd you get the baby pig?

 LUM
 It's Ten's pet.

 SHINOBU
 Um, Ten, it's nice.
 Where did you get it?

 TEN
 A strange old man gave it to me the other day.

 LUM
 Ten, is that true?!
 You're not supposed to take things from strangers...
 But because it's cute, it's OK...

 TEN
 Whee -- I can keep him!

 SHINOBU
 But this baby changes feelings, somehow, doesn't he...
 Huh?

 MEGANE
 Auntie, no seconds yet?

 KAKUGARI
 Hey, the rice...

 ATARU
 Two apiece to a person, I suppose...

 CHIBI
 Hey, that soy sauce...

 KAKUGARI
 Don't drip!

 ATARU
 Hey, give me the soup, the soup!

 MEGANE
 But miso soup is dreary, isn't it --
 rice flour and fermented soybeans...

 ATARU
 Absolutely -- Don't omit it.

 MENDO
 Don't put your chopsticks in someone else's miso soup!

 SHINOBU
 Ah, really gloomy!

 KAKUGARI
 Hey, some rice...

 MEGANE
 Hey, you can't eat as long as you like.
 Quick, let's go to school and get to work,
 we'll miss the opening day of the school festival.

 CHIBI
 With the tank caving in.

 PALMER
 Well, it's a problem, isn't it, that thing.
 That is, making that shop with great pains,
 but if 4 or 5 customers come in, the floor'll cave in.

 LUM
 Darling has already hidden in there -- Can't we remove it somehow?

 PALMER
 Somehow.

 MENDO
 What does ``somehow'' mean.
 Are you just worried that I brought it in?

 CHIBI
 Today, it's just one more day, isn't it.

 KAKUGARI
 On one pretext or another, it's midday already.

 PALMER
 That's true, and we're still not in the classroom.

 TEN
 You are not in the least afraid, are you?

 LUM
 Darling.
 Darling.

 MENDO
 What's the matter?

 LUM
 Darling's disappeared.

 SHINOBU
 Surely he's gone ahead to the school.
 It's rare that you leave him at large.

 MENDO
 Anyhow, as always, the clouds will probably roll in.

 MEGANE
 Yes, excuse us, excuse us.

 MENDO
 AH!
 My tank, my Leopard!

 MEGANE
 No wonder...
 It's this heat, isn't it...

 MENDO
 Shut up!
 Are you giving my tank a bath?!

 MENDO
 Hm?

 ATARU
 *Gasp!*
 Hm, what's this here?
 Oh, Mendo, what are you doing in a place like this?

 MENDO
 Indeed, so it's you...
 So, it was you?!
 By that, do you mean to make a fool of me, Shutaro Mendo?!
 I can't stand it any longer!

 ATARU
 Hey, Mendo, what are you talking about...?

 MENDO
 Have at you!

 ATARU
 Why are you being like this?

 MENDO
 Wait!!

 ATARU
 You're mistaken!!

 MENDO
 Wait!

 LUM
 Darling, I've found you!
 Where have you been until now?

 ATARU
 Wah -- Lum!

 LUM
 Darling!
 Come out before I count to three!
 One!
 Two!!
 Three!!

 SAKURA
 The second time a tragedy, the third time a comedy, so to say...
 Why does it explain his whole life...?

 MENDO
 That is the reason.
 To tell the truth, when I listened to what Sakura said,
 I just didn't believe it, either.
 However, speaking of the tank incident today,
 and the matter of last night, if one thinks about it,
 there have been too many strange things going on lately.
 There is no doubt that the thing has already arrived here.
 Consequently, we must ascertain the truth of the matter
 with our own hands.
 Can't you listen a little to what a person says?

 PALMER
 We're listening politely, but what does it mean?
 Right now, breaking the tension...?

 MEGANE
 I don't think that time and space becoming mixed up is the problem.
 Let's conclude that.

 BODYGUARDS
 No objection!

 MEGANE
 But, according to that, what in fact is the true harm to us?
 We should not fail to ask this...
 Onsen-mark's disappeared.
 Cherry's disappeared.
 To the cause of that...

 BODYGUARDS
 Banzai!!

 MEGANE
 That's the reason.
 The meddlesome priest, the #1 and #2 enemies of the students have disappeared.
 By the way, we aren't going to get all worked up.

 MENDO
 It's out of the question.
 Well, I consulted all of you to try and think about it.
 I was thoughtless.
 Miss Sakura?

 SAKURA
 Well, well, now the mixed yaki-soba will come at once.

 MENDO
 When I will take one step forward...

 ATARU
 Hey, Mendo, take this...

 MENDO
 What's ``this?''

 ATARU
 What do you mean?
 It's the bill.

 MENDO
 I will certainly pay for Sakura, Lum, and Shinobu!
 But why should I pay for your half?!
 All of the developments up until now
 have originated in this Tomobiki High School.
 Whose plot, beyond human knowledge...?
 At any rate, if we investigate it in the middle of the night
 while it's uninhabited, we ought to discover something.
 March!
 Preparing for the worst, Sakura and Shinobu will keep watch here!
 The rest of you, follow me...

 PALMER
 Did you see?
 That sword.
 Although it snapped this afternoon, it's sprouting again.

 ATARU
 Just like a lizard's tail, isn't it?

 MEGANE
 The lighthouse is dark again.
 In his own way, he completely didn't notice, and is conceited.

 MENDO
 Kakugari and Chibi, check out the first floor!
 Megane and Palmer, the second floor!!
 Moroboshi, the third floor!
 Lum and I, to the clock tower!

 ATARU
 OK!

 ATARU
 Yah, ha, ha...
 I'm afraid I'm a brat.
 Shall I play explorer, or what?
 The place where I enjoyed myself with Ryu from the Purchase department...
 Ow!

 MENDO
 I'm scared!
 I'm scared of the dark!!
 I'm scared.

 ATARU
 Hm?
 Why Mendo..

 PALMER
 But Mendo's stingy, isn't he...
 On top of knowing we were penniless, luring us,
 using us in trade for not making a scene about the payment...
 HM!
 Besides, saying we're investigating - What are we looking for?
 I just don't understand it.
 We've gone without a plan, victory or defeat?
 Hey, Megane, aren't you listening?!

 MEGANE
 I'm listening.

 LUM
 Shutaro!
 Shutaro!
 Where did he go?
 Shutaro!
 Where did he go?

 LUM
 Darling!
 Darling!

 CHIBI
 Kakugari, let's use the lights in the hallways.

 KAKUGARI
 A thing like that, in this darkness...
 Hm?

 CHIBI
 Found it!

 KAKUGARI
 Let me see, which one?

 CHIBI
 Well, we'll try one by one.

 ATARU
 It's, it's full of me's.
 I...
 Wah!!

 LUM
 Darling!

 MENDO
 Wah--- I'm afraid of the dark!
 I'm afraid of the dark!
 I'm afraid.
 (Lights go on)

 LUM
 Darling!

 MENDO
 Hah!
 Lum!

 CHIBI
 Not YET?

 KAKUGARI
 You're impatient.

 LUM
 Darling!

 KAKUGARI
 Hm?!

 ATARU
 Wah!

 MENDO
 Lum!

 SAKURA
 At any rate, I guess it's started.

 SHINOBU
 Do you think Mendo and the others are OK?

 SAKURA
 It's not fatal -- Being cowards, they'll probably come running out.
 Look carefully at the schoolhouse!

 SHINOBU
 AH!

 SAKURA
 A 60-year-old, wooden mortar, 3-storied, clock tower schoolhouse --
 Since when has it had 4 floors?

 SAKURA
 What kind of ruckus are that bunch raising in there?
 One can just imagine.

 SHINOBU
 So, you knew from the beginning...

 SAKURA
 Tomobiki High School is in the middle of the chain of events this time.
 But nothing ought to come out of investigating the building itself.
 In short, it's causing the matter.
 Like last night.
 Without fail, something is having an effect.
 In addition to making sure of that,
 there is no other way to approach the heart of the matter!
 Go!
 It's your turn.

 ATARU
 Wah!

 LUM
 Darling, where'd you go?!

 LUM
 Darling!

 KAKUGARI
 Pull out, pull out!

 RYUNOSUKE
 Huh?
 Hey, what's the matter?
 What are those rascals doing in the middle of the night like this?
 But, just like every night, you watching a program, I'm fed up.

 TV
 Madam!
 You mustn't, Junji.

 CHIBI
 All right!
 Hurry!

 LUM
 Hey, what are you doing?

 MENDO
 Hey, what clever mockery are you guys doing in a place like that?

 BODYGUARDS
 WAH!!

 SHINOBU
 What...
 Come here!

 SIGN ON CLOCK
 Defective.

 SAKURA
 Well, what now?
 No matter how much we hurry,
 it'll probably be a repeat performance of last night.

 MENDO
 Go to Tomobiki Ginza's Mach-ken!

 SAKURA
 Why, are you hungry?

 MENDO
 The street stall soba shop, Mach-ken.
 The truth is, it's the Mendo family Tomobiki district Panic Center.
 There's a Sea Harrier in there for escape use.

 SAKURA
 Indeed, you got your hands on a plane?

 PALMER
 Phew, dirty, isn't it.

 MEGANE
 Is there any reason we can't stop just a minute for a drink?

 MENDO
 Mendo residence, this is Shutaro -- Come in, over.

 VOICE
 Yes, Shanghai Restaurant!
 Sorry, we've sent out three orders of char-shew-men.

 MENDO
 Nobody asked you!

 MENDO
 Sakura, please get in.
 Upon our arrival at the mansion, I'll send round a helicopter for you.
 The rest of you, wait for it here!
 Ah...

 ATARU
 We've come this far, haven't we!?

 MEGANE
 If we're like this, all in the same boat,
 it's ``hostile states, same boat.''
 We'll go as far as the depths of Hell.

 MENDO
 Do as you please!
 Maybe you'll fall off!

 MEGANE
 We did it, we did it!

 MEGANE
 Those are the lights of Tomobiki, Wings. What a sight.

 PALMER
 (To ``Star Blazers'' theme...)
 Farewell, Tomobiki, the ship departs...

 ATARU
 He's truly tone-deaf.

 MENDO
 Quiet!

 MEGANE
 Hm?
 That...
 That's...!

 VOICE
 WHAT!?!

 VOICE
 THAT'S CRAZY!!
 Wah---!

 SAKURA
 Mendo!
 Go around the outer orbit of the city!

 ATARU
 That is certainly...

 SAKURA
 My Uncle, after all.

 ATARU
 Oh...!

 MEGANE
 I thought we hadn't seen him lately, but in a place like that...

 VOICE
 Hey, look!

 VOICE
 Onsen-mark...

 MENDO
 What!?
 Out of gas?!

 ATARU
 That's...
 But we can still fly for a few minutes.

 MENDO
 It can't be helped.
 We'll go back.

 PALMER
 Go back, you say -- To that city?

 MENDO
 Is there any other?
 Or shall I drop you off on Cherry's head?

 MENDO
 It's no use, it won't carry us as far as Mach-ken.
 I'll make a nearby hard landing!
 Hang on!

 MOTHER
 Obnoxious, isn't it, at a time like this...

 LUM
 Mother, Father, we're home!

 VOICE
 Good evening!
 We're in your debt tonight, too!

 FATHER
 You don't say?!

 PALMER
 One can whole fancy tomatoes!
 Twelve packs of beef udon!
 Sixteen cups of yaki-soba, the ones with the soup.
 Three liters of cola!

 MEGANE
 Palmer!
 Is ``Chicken of the Sea'' flaked tuna OK?

 PALMER
 Two bags of flour, one dozen spaghetti, two bottles of safflower oil.
 Three cases of Tarako salt, five boxes of cheese biscuits,
 two things of tofu.

 CHIBI
 170 yen, 230 yen, 572 yen, 100 yen, the last one is 125 yen.

 PALMER
 That comes to 10,820 yen...

 KAKUGARI
 Well, let's go!
 If we loiter, we'll get scolded by Ataru's mother.

 MEGANE
 Chibi, what's that chocolate in your shirt?

 CHIBI
 Ha, ha, ha...
 Well, um, I saw it was half eaten.
 It was in the bean jam.

 MEGANE
 With the cooking supplies, down to a pack of bubblegum,
 we will follow Ataru's mother's directions.
 I am afraid you have forgotten this fundamental rule!

 MEGANE
 This town's food, down to one grain of rice,
 down to the last Pocky stick, is everyone's joint property.
 And you put that in your hand for the sake of greed!
 This act deserves death.

 CHIBI
 I'll put it back.

 MEGANE
 Go to the police station.
 As soon as we return, we'll open a public court to punish you!

 CHIBI
 Wah -- NO!

 PALMER
 Fool...

 MEGANE
 IOU 10,823 yen...

 MEGANE
 Let's go!

 MEGANE
 My name is Megane.
 Formerly, I attended Tomobiki High School as an ordinary
 high school student, continuously fighting the daily tedium,
 I was a person wearing clogs.
 But that night, from the cockpit of a Sea Harrier,
 I witnessed that shocking spectacle, that greatly changed my destiny.

 MEGANE
 Since the day after we crash-landed in Ataru's house in the Harrier,
 the world has changed its attitude
 assuming a completely defiant attitude.
 The same city as always...
 The same corner stores as always...
 The same parks as always...
 But something is different...

 MEGANE
 The shadows of cars, coming and going, have disappeared from the streets...
 The sounds of pianos, in the gardens of the ready-built houses,
 have also ceased...
 There are no people eating hurriedly at the counters
 of the beef udon shops.
 In this city --
 No, in this world --
 Besides just us, these dear people have suddenly disappeared.
 Many days, unending Armageddon was passing.

 MEGANE
 Who in the world expected this quiet, this too-soon end?
 The culture that the human race strenuously built in bygone days
 over many thousands of years, the Christian age, has ended.

 MEGANE
 However, for us who were left behind,
 the end is no more than a new beginning.
 Since the day the world announced its end,
 we began the battle of everyday survival.

 MEGANE
 Oddly enough, the convenience store near Ataru's house,
 without the rush for desolation, put an end to that brave posture,
 displaying an abundant stock of groceries, daily necessities, etc.
 Then again, strangely enough, there was also electricity
 in Ataru's house...
 Both gas and running water continued to be supplied as before...
 Astonishingly enough, the daily paper is still being delivered.

 MEGANE
 Naturally, we established Ataru's house as our base
 for the ``maintenance of the human race.''
 However, for some reason,
 Miss Sakura quickly opened the Haratama beef udon shop,
 to declare her self-support.
 Next, Ryunosuke and her father opened a ``Father and Son (?)''
 seaside teashop behind the high school.
 Then, Mendo...

 MEGANE
 He was riding around in the tank one day,
 probably dissolved by frustration.
 Occasionally we return fire.
 I don't know why he's dissatisfied, but the truth is, I don't care.

 MEGANE
 How many months have passed since that fateful night...?
 But now, neither clocks nor calendars are of any use.
 We have been guaranteed food, clothing, shelter, for our survival,
 we haven't chosen any kind of leader.
 An Earthly paradise...
 Perhaps we will realize that eternal Shangri-La.
 Ah...
 The charms and anxieties of the chosen ones are with us!
 When we recognize that the future of the human race
 rests entirely on our shoulder --
 the excitement, resembling giddiness, will not be forbidden!

 CHIBI
 Hey, what's the matter, Megane?

 PALMER
 Sunstroke...?!
 So wear a hat.

 MEGANE
 By Megane.
 Excerpt from the introduction to Chapter 3,
 ``Surmounting the End'', of Volume 1 of
 ``Complete History of Tomobiki''.

 LUM
 Yahoo!

 MEGANE
 Hey!
 Wah...

 MEGANE
 Ah!

 LUM
 Hey -- Darling!

 VOICES
 Wah!
 Wah!

 SHINOBU
 Got it!

 MEGANE
 Ah, it's a masterpiece.

 MEGANE
 Now, one broth...

 PALMER
 Just a minute, the onions...

 LUM
 Yes, here's seconds.

 BODYGUARDS
 Oh!
 No objections.

 LUM
 Mom, it's just not enough.

 LUM
 We'll not have any soon, and...
 Hm?

 MOTHER
 Yes, yes, yes.
 Really!
 Although Ataru by himself is troublesome..
 Ah, Shinobu, use the onions as far as the green part, all right?

 SHINOBU
 Yes, I know, ma'am.

 MOTHER
 Really, you've saved me.
 Shinobu is such a help.
 I wish I'd had her here all the time, she's perfect.

 SHINOBU
 Oh, *GOSH*, ma'am!

 LUM
 Grr...

 LUM
 Yahoo!

 LUM
 Shutaro, will you go swimming with me?

 MENDO
 Oh, Lum.
 Well, now, I'm a little...

 LUM
 Why don't you play with everyone else?

 MENDO
 Because I want to investigate a little.
 So...

 LUM
 Hmm...

 TEN
 Lum, if we don't hurry, the water'll get cold.

 TEN
 Yah -- I want a sip!

 LUM
 Ha, ha!

 MENDO
 Lum, what do you think of this world?

 LUM
 It's a lot of fun.
 See you later.

 VOICE
 Auntie, it's gone already -- Next Course!

 MOTHER
 Yes! How about a salad?

 LUM
 Yes, Mother.

 MOTHER
 Oh, Lum -- Uh, where's Shinobu?

 LUM
 Well, I don't know.

 MOTHER
 Strange, isn't it.
 Where do you suppose she went?
 Well, if she's gone somewhere else, she'll come back soon...?

 MENDO
 But Shinobu didn't come back.
 When next morning came...

 MENDO
 Then, again...

 RYUNOSUKE'S FATHER
 Ryunosuke---!

 MENDO
 Ryunosuke disappeared.
 While making a pot of oden...
 Just as if she'd casually gone to the washroom for a while...
 Our desperate search being ineffective,
 nothing whatever was found out about the pair's whereabouts.

 MENDO
 WAH!

 MENDO
 I found her!
 It's Shinobu!

 SAKURA
 After all...

 MENDO
 Shinobu!
 Shinobu!

 SAKURA
 Calm down, Mendo.
 Ryunosuke might be down there, too, with a likeness,
 but that is an image!

 MENDO
 Image?!

 SAKURA
 Thanks for your help.
 I'll pull you up now. 
 (To herself)
 To say nothing of my Uncle.
 Onsen-mark approached the heart of the matter without a moment's delay.
 Then, Shinobu and Ryunosuke, whom Ataru made passes at.
 No matter how I look at it, it's my turn next.

 LETTER
 Without talking to other people,
 I want to meet with you to talk alone.
 Attend me at once, to discuss what you think of the way of this world,
 with regards to our existence...
 I will be waiting this evening,
 behind the Tomobiki High School clock tower. -- Sakura

 ATARU
 Sakura---!
 Sorry to keep you waiting!

 MENDO
 Welcome, Moroboshi.

 ATARU
 Mendo, why are you here?

 SAKURA
 I called him.

 ATARU
 Well, you said to meet you alone, without talking to the others...?

 SAKURA
 A lie.

 ATARU
 I'm going back!

 MENDO
 Go back, eh?
 Where do you intend to go back to, Moroboshi!

 SAKURA
 It's true that I have to speak.
 Won't you just listen?

 ATARU
 Yeah, yeah...

 MENDO
 It's me, you see, Moroboshi...
 While all of you have been idling the time away
 while playing in this mixed-up world,
 I haven't been riding around in a tank just for fun.
 Keeping in touch with Sakura,
 I'm investigating the organization of this world,
 and we're planning a way to return to our own world, somehow.

 ATARU
 Thanks for the trouble...

 MENDO
 How difficult were those days...?
 I just played!
 Forgetting everything, I passed the days happily with.Lum!

 ATARU
 You should get accustomed to doing strange things.

 MENDO
 What!
 Not even understanding the situation you've been put in,
 you're getting fat!

 SAKURA
 Stop it!
 Will you calm down, Mendo.
 Introduce the main question.

 MENDO
 Sorry.
 To continue...
 For the sake of brainless old you, I'll explain things in logical order.
 All right?
 This table is our world, riding on that huge turtle --
 in short, it's Tomobiki.

 MENDO
 Now, this is your house.
 I myself will represent the range of the main gun of the Leopard,
 and according to the measured results,
 the center of this world is situated in this circle,
 with diameter of about 2 kilometers.
 The main street is the center of the world.
 The fact that a world like this is flying in the sky
 on the back of a turtle is unusual enough,
 but the problem is in a particular place.
 Why is the Moroboshi house the only one that is still supplied with gas,
 running water, and electricity?
 No -- in the first place, from where are they being supplied?
 Has a bill arrived?

 MENDO
 You and Megane and the others are eating like crazy,
 but why doesn't the convenience store run out of groceries?!
 Again, where have the other citizens of this town disappeared to?!
 And that in only one night!
 Eh?
 Why?!

 ATARU
 Do I know?

 MENDO
 Everyday life is not without inconveniences;
 no, in order to do away with the inconveniences of everyday life,
 this world is becoming really mixed up;
 nonsensical;
 one could well say, preposterous!
 A world like this is physically impossible.
 Therefore, if it exists...

 ATARU
 Only in a dream...
 Right?

 MENDO
 Moroboshi!
 You knew that?!

 ATARU
 I've suspected it for a long time now.
 Megane and the others have, too.
 It's just an unspeakable story, with too cheap a conclusion.

 MENDO
 Knowing that, why play around every day!
 That attitude of yours, I...!

 ATARU
 For the time being, why not just play?!
 Because we don't know whose dream it is!

 MENDO
 Oho---?
 You don't know?!
 I see, I see!
 You don't know!
 Ha, ha, ha -- it serves you right!
 You don't know!
 Ha, ha, ha...
 Great bathing beach-houses...!
 *I* know!

 MENDO
 All right?
 Moroboshi, it's a simple problem of elimination.

 MENDO
 It certainly can't be Sakura or I,
 or Shinobu or Ryunosuke who disappeared.
 It must be an annoyance to your parents to have so many people
 in their house, therefore exclude them.
 It is certainly not yourself, Moroboshi.
 If it were, right now this world would be filled with women.

 ATARU
 How well you know me...

 MENDO
 Jari-Ten, the baby pig,
 and the father of the missing Ryunosuke being out of the question,
 five people remain.
 Megane and the others are living happily under one roof with Lum --
 the four being in one place is the problem.
 If it were their dream,
 naturally they would steal an unrestricted march on the rest.
 I don't think any of them would be charitable enough
 to just make the other three think virtuous thoughts.
 If that's the case...
 Lum...!?

 ATARU
 Why her?

 MENDO
 What, is there a mistake in my reasoning?

 ATARU
 Apart from the other things,
 making Shinobu and Ryu disappear -- Really.
 She's not the type of woman who'd do a thing like that.
 Living with her for so many years, I know her well.

 MENDO
 Moroboshi, you impudent...!

 SAKURA
 Concerning that point, I too am of the same opinion.
 The story up to now being an outline, let's shoot at the main point.
 Only, the Princess is Lum --
 The turtle, inviting people to the Dragon Palace to the bitter end!
 To make Lum's desires real this way,
 is forgetting the existence of the one who made this world.

 ATARU
 Yes, yes, that's it, that's it.

 SAKURA
 What are you admiring -- I'm talking about you!

 ATARU
 Eh?!
 But, what do you mean by that?

 SAKURA
 I'm saying, therefore you're the turtle!

 ATARU
 Ha, ha, ha!
 Tell me another one, Sakura!
 That's it -- I made this world?!

 SAKURA
 As you say!

 ATARU
 Sakura...
 As a mere high school student, I can't do an outrageous thing like that!

 SAKURA
 The ``mere high school student'' is over there.
 You can come out!

 ATARU
 Gack!!

 REAL ATARU
 Hello, hello.

 ATARU
 What in the world?
 THIS?!

 SAKURA
 Schemer, you'll drown in schemes.
 You intended to set a trap, but you fell into a trap.
 After receiving my letter, do you think this guy would wait until night?

 REAL ATARU
 Heh, heh, heh...
 I came to Sakura as soon as I got it.
 Since noon.
 Ha, ha, ha...

 SAKURA
 To the business of earlier this evening.
 Shall I try to break this world?!

 SAKURA
 Visit!!

 ``ATARU''
 Oh no, I'm discovered?
 Two of us, and one is evil.

 MENDO
 We're prepared for you, shape-changer!

 MENDO
 Eh?!

 SAKURA
 Step back - to you, he's no toothless opponent.
 Whatever he looks like, he's the Evil Dream Demon!

 DEMON
 Yes, I am certainly the Evil Dream Demon.
 Nice to meet you.
 But, sister, you don't know everything about me.

 SAKURA
 Shall I tell?!
 ``Evil Dream Demon'' reads ``Evil Demon of Dreams''!
 To show the meaning of that name,
 the Evil Demon rejoices in manipulating dreams,
 sowing the seeds of the Evil Demon in everyone!
 The darkest parts of blood-smeared history.
 In there, usually squirming in darkness, was he!
 Who beguiled a bashful art student into an insane dictator?!!
 Why did the famous emperor --
 loving poetry, having a good government --
 destroy the capital by fire at the end of his bloody despotism!?!
 The pious disciple who betrayed his teacher,
 the faithful friend who killed that sworn friend by sword.
 The heart of Gautama, too,
 was deluded while getting thorough training under the spiritual tree,
 and Adam and Eve also ate the forbidden fruit --
 Completely losing sight of themselves in the questionable dreams
 you inspired!

 DEMON
 Won't you wait just a minute, sister?
 What grounds in the world do you have for saying that!?

 SAKURA
 Grounds?
 In the Complete Shrine Maiden's Handbook ``Best 100 Evil Spirits'',
 it says so clearly.
 Excuses are useless!
 I don't know what you are planning by making Lum's dream,
 but exposing your true form like this, has also crushed your plans!
 Quickly, let us out of this dream, and depart!

 DEMON
 If you listen to what this sister says, I seem to be a devil.

 SAKURA
 You are like that!

 DEMON
 You're joking!
 Hey, well, you learn many tricks from mortals,
 but I am remarkably long-lived!
 That's it...
 I'm a scoundrel.
 I've lived a long time.
 Hey, I've made a lot of different people have dreams.
 Sister, I am certainly the person who spun the dream
 of the person you spoke of, the one you're in.
 But, you misunderstand me, you've got it all wrong.

 DEMON
 I just create dreams of what I think the person wants to see.
 So therefore, if the dream becomes evil,
 that is because it is that person's evil wish.

 SAKURA
 ``A person's heart is made up of good and evil.''
 It's the overused sophistry of scientists.

 DEMON
 You're exaggerating -- I make good dreams, too!
 But still, if everyone were long-lived, it would be weird, wouldn't it.
 Leaving me behind, everyone becoming an evil dream.
 The last one will end up being eaten by a tin trumpet, eh?

 DEMON
 Whenever that happens,
 I search again for a fragment of a special dream, from there to here...
 >From here to there, I return to the same thing.
 I'm already tired out.
 Already I'd rather stop giving people dreams.
 I'll go out with a ``bang.''
 I thought that way would be easier, somehow.

 DEMON
 It was that kind of time, when I found her...
 She was at an aquarium somewhere.

 DEMON
 She understood me at once.
 She was born under very different stars...

 SAKURA
 Well, it's because she's an alien.

 DEMON
 Say, do you like fish?

 LUM
 Not particularly...

 DEMON
 Hey, did you have a fight with your boyfriend?
 It looks like he didn't show up, so you came here by yourself.

 DEMON
 Hey, this is the kind of person I am.

 LUM
 Mr. Evil Dream Demon? I'm Lum.

 DEMON
 Miss Lumdatchya?
 Oh, Lum!
 It's sweet -- a little bitter, but a good name.
 (To Sakura)
 That's how I met her...

 LUM
 Dreams?

 DEMON
 Yes, my work is making dreams.
 Fun dreams, sad dreams, scary dreams -- Well I work extensively.
 But, that's it, you see --
 After making one last dream, I'm going to retire.
 With regards to personal relations, my sufferings are many...
 I'm in the service industry, after all, you see?
 Ha, ha, ha...

 LUM
 Hm...

 DEMON
 Well, how would you like to be my last job?
 Will you let me make ``Lum's Dream''?
 Of course, there's no charge.
 What do you say?

 LUM
 My dream?

 DEMON
 I have been searching for a long time.
 I changed during a bad dream,
 and I want to create a world of pure, eternal dreams.
 It's OK if it's you.
 You understand me.
 So, give me your answer.

 LUM
 Heh, heh, heh...
 My dream, eh?
 With Darling...
 And Mother and Father, and Ten, and Shutaro, and Megane and the others,
 I want to live happily ever after.
 That's my dream.

 DEMON
 Heh, thank you, thank you.
 Thanks very much for your kind attention.
 No, sister.
 Don't do anything with that youthfulness.
 Although I once thought I might become nothing,
 I've discovered youth at the end, haven't I?

 DEMON
 After all, I kept pace with the history of the dreams of the human race,
 they weren't my enemies.
 Hey, now, calm down.
 Ah, for the sake of Lum (and my reputation),
 what I said before, that is the truth.
 For the sake of feelings saying it was a good dream.
 Going away in the shadows of the people I've helped, getting conceited,
 this dream-city is the safest aftercare in exchange for giving them
 daydreams-to-go.

 DEMON
 This, too, is the spirit of the Evil Dream Demon!
 His conscience.
 However, for the present, this dream has been made secure.
 Because brats and asses are foolish.
 But I took the role of ``Ataru-the-foolish'' as a matter of course,
 truly giving spirit to the management of the dream...

 DEMON
 It's a delicate boundary, isn't it...
 Heh, heh, heh.
 Huh?
 Wah!
 Wh -- What how did you get loose?!

 ATARU
 Uncle, thinking I'd knock you down if you'd messed with Lum,
 I jumped off the verandah, and fell in the water.
 I climbed up just now.

 UNCLE
 I see, I see, so now you'll repeat it?
 Hold on, brother.

 ATARU
 Well, so now we square off!
 Uncle, how's this -- Won't you make a deal with me?

 DEMON
 Cut the crap.
 Tell me the merit in dealing with you!

 ATARU
 The thing Sakura gave me to use in self-defense.

 DEMON
 Brother, that's a deal!

 ATARU
 Ha, ha, ha -- I did it, I did it.
 At last, my eternal dream has become a reality.
 Ha, ha, ha...

 DEMON
 Well, with this around, you'll probably be at peace.

 DEMON
 It's not to my taste.
 But if I think about it, it's like this after all.
 I don't understand the deal very well.
 He's foolish.

 ATARU
 Hey, uncle!

 DEMON
 What -- Is there something else?

 ATARU
 Look around -- Lum's not here in these girls.
 What happened to her?

 DEMON
 What are you talking about now?

 ATARU
 Lum's not here.
 Why isn't she here?
 Hm?
 What's the matter?

 DEMON
 What are you thinking?
 I thought you meant to escape from that girl, what?

 ATARU
 Ha, ha -- Indeed, for a person so long-lived,
 you're a very poor judge of human character.
 The reason is -- I've grown up.

 ATARU
 All right, listen up.
 Just like the other girls, I've taken a fancy to Lum, on schedule.
 Only, she interferes if I mix with other girls;
 and as it turns out, I just go running back to her.
 Understand?
 If you understand, hand over Lum!
 If Lum's left out of the harem, it's an imperfect dream.
 I'll ruin a thing like that, and return to reality!

 DEMON
 You rascal!?
 Cut it out!
 Just try and do that!!

 ATARU
 Ouch!

 ATARU
 What's this?

 DEMON
 AHH!
 Give it back, that's important, it will call Baku...
 OOP!!

 ATARU
 Baku?!
 Ha, ha, Sakura told me about that.
 The legendary beast that eats bad dreams?
 I see, so that's it?

 DEMON
 Not again, not this again.
 Why do humans do these things?

 ATARU
 Uncle, what are you going to do?
 Will you give me Lum?
 Will you?

 DEMON
 What an ass!
 Can *I* do a thing like that?!
 In the first place, this world is that girl's dream!

 ATARU
 Well, I will return to reality and ruin this dream,
 by blowing this thing!

 DEMON
 No, I will protect that girl's pure dream!

 ATARU
 What do you mean, pure!
 Dragging us in, unknowing?!
 I'm going to blow it.

 DEMON
 Wah!
 Stop, stop!
 Do you know what you're doing?!

 ATARU
 You're the same as Lum.
 You still don't understand my policy of acting with
 out thought of the consequences?!
 I'll return to reality!
 (Blows horn)

 ATARU
 Wh -- What's that noise?

 DEMON
 You rascal.
 That tin trumpet will run amok.
 My important dream is being ruined!

 DEMON
 Ass!
 Fool!
 Scum!
 Dick!
 *Sob!*

 ATARU
 Calm down.
 At any rate, what's a dream, really!
 It's all right!

 DEMON
 Don't you understand anything?
 How different reality is, from the dreams I make.
 Living in other people's dreams ever since I was born,
 continuing other people's dreams...
 Just once I'd like to have my dream!
 Why did you have to ruin that!?

 ATARU
 Wah!!

 CHERRY
 Oh, isn't that the unlucky young man, over there?

 ATARU
 Cherry!
 Just like a priest -- Where were you loafing?!!

 CHERRY
 In this white space.
 This world is completely an illusion.
 If you wake up, it will all be resolved.

 ATARU
 Shout!

 DEMON
 Expert, I won't let you escape!!

 ATARU
 Ungh...
 Ah, where am I!?
 What am I doing?

 MENDO
 Woke up at last?
 A loud snore in this wintry air feels good.

 ATARU
 I see...
 After buying beef udon for dinner, I fell asleep...?
 That city was completely that Evil Dream Demon's dream, too...
 But, it really was a dream in poor taste.

 MENDO
 Hmph, well, you're a parrot, aren't you, saying ``dream''.
 While you were having it, it was desperately real.
 But if you think about it, there's no proof that this instant,
 talking with you like this, is not a dream.

 ATARU
 Ha, ha, ha, it can't be...

 DEMON
 You can't be.
 I told you you wouldn't escape.
 It's just you.
 You absolutely will not get away!

 ATARU
 Wah -- Idiot!
 A red light!!

 DEMON
 Eh?!

 ATARU
 I'll faint again and get out.

 ATARU
 He's a rock-head like me.
 Yah!

 MOTHER
 Ataru!
 Ataru!
 Get up, Ataru!

 MOTHER
 There's no spare time for fainting, Ataru!!

 ATARU
 Hm?
 Wah!

 ANNOUNCER
 Mr. Moroboshi has stood up.
 The indomitable man, Ataru Moroboshi,
 will again challenge the fate of the Earth,
 but there's scarcely 10 minutes left!
 Can he grab the horns of Lum the demon girl, and save Earth?!

 SHINOBU
 Fight, Ataru!
 For the sake of our marriage!

 ATARU
 That's so, isn't it.
 For the sake of our marriage...
 Hey, Lum!
 Look at this!

 LUM
 Ah!
 All right, you!
 Give me back my Sunday best!

 ATARU
 Goal...

 ATARU
 Wait -- If I don't catch these horns, the beginning...

 ANNOUNCER
 AHH!!
 Time's up!
 Time is up!
 What could this mean?!
 What was he thinking of, this enemy of Earth -- Ataru Moroboshi!
 This traitor!!

 VARIOUS VOICES
 You good-for-nothing!
 Ne'er-do-well!
 Scum! Kill!

 ATARU
 Gack!!

 VOICES
 You traitor!
 Scum!
 Vermin!
 Apologize by dying!
 Blockhead!!

 ATARU
 Ungh...

 MEGANE
 I did it!
 At last it's a success!

 DWARF
 Congratulations, Doctor.

 ATARU
 My name is Franken-Ataru.
 I was in a coma of unknown origin,
 and revived in this world as an artificial person.
 Why did I develop a high tolerance for high voltages?
 I guess I was lucky.

 ATARU
 Lucky...!?
 But only looks filled with hostility were waiting for me in this world.
 Everybody hates me, the ones who speak are stupid, no one approaches me.
 (To girl)
 Ah...

 DEMON
 Say, what are you doing to that girl?
 Don't touch her!

 ATARU
 Th - That fiend!
 Fool!
 None of your cheap tricks!
 Without fail, I will return to reality!

 NARRATOR
 The two, riding on a gust of wind, approached each other.
 They approach the point of contact, of life and death!

 DEMON
 I won...

 ATARU
 (Pants)
 Hah, hah...

 FATHER'S VOICE
 Have you woken up?
 Ataru -- You're probably surprised,
 but for no listen closely to what your father says.
 If you are listening to this tape,
 neither your mother nor your father exist in this world.

 FATHER'S VOICE
 I and others spared no pains trying to make you and Lum
 wake up from your mysterious coma.
 However, the science of Earth at present --
 no, not even the science of Urusei -- could make you two wake up.
 Forgive us...
 Trusting to your last wishes,
 we have entrusted your fates to the future.
 We think it may be possible, with the science of many centuries later,
 to make you two wake up.

 FATHER'S VOICE
 Ataru, no matter what kind of era you are in,
 live forcefully.
 Lum's parents said to give their best regards to Lum.
 This is the end of the talk; but the cost of the gold slip --
 please take care of the 500 year loan.
 Farewell, Ataru...

 ATARU
 400 years after the emergency...!?
 Wah!

 ATARU
 WAH!!

 ATARU
 Ah...
 Wah!
 What, not a set?!

 DEMON
 You!
 I can't get the next one prepared, if you come out when I'm not ready!
 Take this!

 DEMON
 Now, remarkably, as if you've been answered.
 I think you'll think of a good dream.

 DEMON
 And reality is good...
 Therefore, ask me to do a dream over.
 No matter many times, I'll bring you back.
 Say, do you know of this?
 A man dreamed that he was a butterfly, but upon awakening,
 and realizing which self was real, maybe, he thought,
 his real self was the butterfly he dreamed of?
 Well, dream or reality, after all it's your point of view.
 If so, wouldn't you rather have an amusing way of life in a dream
 that I make for you?
 Even you -- No matter how absurd,
 I'll make any kind of good dream for you.

 DEMON
 The dreams I make are the same as reality...
 Therefore, it would be bad if they didn't end, so I won't do that.
 So I'll wait up above, and I'll come when you decide.
 No, no -- If you'd just climb these stairs, that would be better.
 Well, I'll be waiting.

 GIRL
 Brother, why do you want to go back?

 ATARU
 Brother, huh?
 It's for the sake of the woman I love -- It hurts, being of that woman.
 I don't suppose you understand, because you're a girl.

 GIRL
 Shall I tell you?

 ATARU
 Eh, do you know? Do you know the way to return to reality?

 GIRL
 Everyone knows. You're just forgetting to wake up.

 GIRL
 Do this -- Jump off of here.
 Then, if you keep your eyes open until you reach the bottom,
 call out the names of all the people you want to meet.
 The people whose names you don't call out will surely be disagreeable
 when you open you eyes.
 It'll be OK if you do that.
 Because you're full of women that you want to meet.

 GIRL
 In exchange for that...
 Promise me something?

 ATARU
 Yes?

 LITTLE LUM
 Be responsible!

 ATARU
 WAH!

 ATARU
 AHH!

 ATARU
 Ran!
 Oyuki!
 Benten!
 Shinobu!
 Sakura!

 ATARU
 Ryoko!
 Otama!
 Ryunosuke!
 Tsuyuko!

 ATARU
 Kintaro's nurse!
 One girl in the flower shop!
 Kaede!

 ATARU
 The dolphin girl!
 Mom!!
 LUM!
 LUM!!!

 ATARU
 Ooh...
 This brat doesn't know anybody's troubles.
 Get up, blockhead!

 ATARU
 Hm?
 Hah!

 LUM
 Darling...
 Darling, I had a dream.
 Darling, and Ten, and Mother and Father, and Megane and the others...

 ATARU
 Lum, that's a dream.
 Only a dream.

 VOICE
 AHEM!!

 ATARU
 Aha...

 LUM
 Go on...

 ATARU
 Don't talk crazy.
 Can you do a disgraceful thing like that in front of people??

 LUM
 Why?
 How come?
 Why can't you do it in front of people?
 If you love me, you ought to be able to!

 ATARU
 When did I say I loved you?!

 LUM
 What!
 Still saying that kind of vexing thing?!

 ATARU
 Wah -- Stop, stop.
 YAH!

 WORKMAN 1
 Hey, those two are at it again.

 WORKMAN 2
 Really!
 Because for them, there's neither progress nor growth.

 WORKMAN 2
 Do it til you die.

 DEMON
 The truth of the matter is...
 It's no easy matter to associate with those people.
 Shall we go?

 THE END


			    E n r i q u e  C o n t y
			      jester@ihlpl.att.com
